Some Girls Want the Fluffy Declaration of Love... I Want the Real Declaration

Hi Mary!
You know how some of your girlfriends have that sappy love story, about how he confessed his feelings, or the romantic proposal under the stars? Well, I have a feeling that they way it goes down for me will be much more like this scene from "When Harry Met Sally."

Thanks Mary Jones for the fantastic V-Day present!

I know what's going on here

Hi Mary! Remember when I was talking about my faux date (weeks back)? Well, nothing ever materialized, because he's in a relationship. And we all know what that means: he's on the shelf. So, I'm curious. How many of you women out there have been in a situation where a guy is CLEARLY flirting with you, but never says one direct line so that you can call him on it?

It's Wedding Season ... And For Some Reason, I'm Feeling Pewter

I have quite a few weddings coming up this Spring/Summer and that has me on the hunt for a new dress. J Crew has some really cute ones. Check them out:

Cyber Stalker ... And pretty proud of it

Hi Mary! Do you remember the days when you would be set up on a blind date by your friend and all the information you got was his name? I'd always be so curious, wanting to know if Bill was cute, stylish, or even funny. Well now thanks to Google search and Facebook, I can find out almost anything. I've gone so far as to have friends Facebook someone so I can get the info. I'm so crafty at my P.I. work that I've been nicknamed Harriet the Spy.

But the question is, does it taint that first meeting? Does knowing he has 474 friends or that he travels with his family on European vacations (Facebook photo albums can give you a lot of info) set you up for investing too much? I mean if the guy's Facebook is set to public (or even a certain network) you can find out a lot --- and tell yourself he's perfect! All the while, you're forgetting that you don't even know him!

No More Unavailable Men

Hi Mary! I spent last night bonding with my girls from book club, and I had a mini-epiphany. Here I am, in my 30s single, and all my younger Marys (barely half way through their 20s) are all in these healthy relationships with great guys. What's the common denominator you ask? They're dating AVAILABLE men and they believe they're worth it.

Now I'm not quite sure why I seem to draw in the guys who forget to call, are in "complicated" relationships, or can't be bothered to spend the night, but it's a new year and I'm ready for a new type of man. I'm done with giving guys second chances, and ultimately being disappointed.

As one of my younger Marys last night said "If the guy isn't pursuing you, then he's just not the one for you." It sounds like a pretty simple piece of advice to abide by, but all the single ladies out there understand that it's harder than that. It's like you lie to yourself, telling yourself that sometimes things can be bumpy. Maybe he's not calling like you'd want, but maybe you need to be more casual? My response? Fuck that. I want a guy who has the decency to return a phone call, or better yet not hang out with me if he's not sure.

In the meantime, I'll be the one of the few single ladies going to see "He's Just Not That Into You" on Sunday, amidst a sea of 20-somethings who haven't had a decade of bad dating behind them. But you know what? Good for them!